In the societal sense, it is better to be unproductive at something productive. Society at large will commend you for slaving away at your schoolwork or your job, even if you find no enjoyment, and even if it is the cause of your own pain. Many will even call you lazy if you partake in an activity that brings you fulfillment in happiness if it is not one that society has deemed beneficial. But something that is beneficial to your well being is equally, if not more important than something that puts food on the table.

Can relate, bro! This I believe: "I don't know..." there that is the real you! Whereas "I do know that I should be doing my..." there that is not the real you! that's the result of some kind of mind control! When totally under the influence of the controller, you wouldn't have any way to know the existence of the controller! Just like in Warcraft III quote: "You brought me back!?" "What must I do?" "Why have I been summoned?" "Hi..." "I must obey..." "If that is your wish..."