Gain 200 lbs and eat A LOT of Doritos and drink 6 gallons of Mountain Dew every 6 hours! You're gonna need that gamer fuel. Delete every female contact from your phone, they will only drag you down and make you waste time. Be sure to grease up the controller every morning. Also you can go ahead and disconnect the plumbing to your bathtub/shower. You won't be bathing anymore if you wanna get good. Alternatively if you do have a bathtub, you can use it to store your Mountain Dew.

Good luck, gamer!

Don't forget to cut a hole in the seat of your $2000 gaming chair. It's for the bucket.

That's some solid advice, Thanks for it fellow gamers!