Title: Optional

Text: I've met kids who got into Radiohead before eighth grade, they're essentially bed ridden... So why expose your child to the bottomless pain of a British ginger whose Pit in the Pendulum vocals aren't gonna undo the fact that you had backne? Until the age of fourteen, the only song my daughter ever heard was Who Let the Dogs Out. My choice. And sure, she may know nothing of culture and have no sense of style, but at least she's not some Ichabod Crane child who's afraid of his own dick. Each paragraph will be a test.

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