I regret to inform you that replying "skill issue" to something that cannot in fact be a skill issue is the most hilarious joke in the history of comedy. Born in the wrong year? Skill issue. Haven't seen a unicorn? Skill issue.
As a Linux User, I would recommend windows to everyone because linux is not for everyone, it is hard to learn, not too much advantages for a normal user.
- Jack Story
Louis, have you ever heard of a jack story? A man gets a flat tire on a country road. He sees a house in the distance. He walks up to the house, and along the way, he starts thinking, "What if they don't have a jack? What if they have a jack, but they want to charge me for it, and if they do, how much would they charge? $100, $200, $1,000? That's bullshit." So by the time the man gets to the house, rings the doorbell, and they answer the door, he tells them, "Keep your jack!"
- Don't stuff beans up your nose
The little boy's mother was going off to the market. She worried about her son, who was always up to some mischief. She sternly admonished him, "Be good. Don't get into trouble. Don't eat all the chocolate. Don't spill all the milk. Don't throw stones at the cow. Don't fall down the well." The boy had done all of these things on previous market days. Hoping to head off new trouble, she added, "And don't stuff beans up your nose!" This was a new idea for the boy, who promptly tried it out.
- Death from laughter
Death from laughter is a supposedly extremely rare form of death, usually resulting from either cardiac arrest or asphyxiation, that has itself been caused by a fit of laughter. Instances of death by laughter have been recorded from the times of ancient Greece to modern times. Usually, the phrase "dying from laughter" is used as a hyperbole.
- I sit here for you.
So now I sit here for you every year, John. Like the fool I am, reminiscing every memory I have with you in it. And I regret, sometimes I chuckle, and very often, I cry. But if I'm going to waste my tears, I'm confident in wasting them on you. I'm sorry for not being there when you were so clearly struggling. I'm sorry for wasting precious days because we argued, or fell out, or 'grew up'. I'm sorry for never telling you how much I really do love you. I cannot put into words how sorry I am.
- The Office
I will not be blackmailed by some ineffectual, privileged, effete, soft-penised debutante. You wanna start a street fight with me, bring it on. You're gonna be surprised by how ugly it gets. You don't even know my real name. I'm the f--ing Lizard King.
- The Horse Of My Lifetime
Like in a movie, the trailer will drive off into the sunset and I'll be left hoping that Castle knows how much he has changed my life for the better, how much I'll miss him, and how much I never wanted this to happen. Days of melancholy will come, but I'll soon realise that it was for the best. I'll continue to grow as a rider, and Castle no doubt, go on to make another kid as happy as he made me. To the horse of my lifetime, I'd like to give my endless thank you's.
I got one entire song from fortune cookies. On another one, I took words from different Frank Sinatra songs and pasted them together. Another one, I was just driving around and there was a piece of paper on the ground, so I stole it.
- The Office - The Perfect Crime
Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting. I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
- Graceland Too - Verse 2
So she picks a direction, it's 90 to Memphis. Turns up the music so thoughts don't intrude. Predictably winds up thinking of Elvis. And wonders if he believed songs could come true. I'm asking for it if they do. Doesn't know what she wants, or what she's gonna do. A rebel without a clue.
an aspiring author
- a quote from my book
Father Trust took a long draw from his cigarette. "Fools like him, heaven isn't enough. There's not a paradise in the whole universe he could live with," he said as the smoke escaped his lips and drew puffy white ribbons that danced along the frame of his face.
- Why Incest Should be Legal
Okay today's Ted Talk is why incest should be legal. Incest is the act of when an individual has hardcore hot steamy intense hardcore sexual intercourse with his or hers own family members. Like it or not we are all collectively a byproduct of incest therefore it is only natural that incest must be legal. A notable professor who has worked with Vought and the Justice League, has proven children born from incest have naturally higher forms of strength, knowledge, and integrity.
- Little Women, 1994
I find it poor logic to say that because women are good, women should vote. Men do not vote because they are good; they vote because they are male, and women should vote, not because we are angels and men are animals, but because we are human beings and citizens of this country.
- I meant it when I said "Forever."
One day I'll get married to someone that is not you. I'll have it all planned out; the place, the music, the vows. I'll stand at the alter I always pictured us in front of and listen to a song that is not ours. I'll spew empty guarantees, "Until death do us parts." And cross my fingers behind my back. I'll pretend I never promised you forever at 14, and tell them they are what has been missing. I'll look into their blue eyes, and try so hard not to morph them into brown.
- The Ersatz Elevator
The book you are holding in your two hands right now - assuming that you are, in fact, holding this book, and that you have only two hands - is one of two books in the world that will show you the difference between the word "nervous" and the word "anxious." The other book, of course, is the dictionary, and if I were you I would read that book instead.
Will Wood - The Normal Album
- BlackBoxWarrior - OKULTRA
Well, he collapsed with Steven Johnson's Syndrome on the ER floor, panic attacked, anaphylactic and ataxic. The way he spun his butterfly, risked all six his phalanges, roman candles at both ends in his synapses. And the method in which he recycled his humors, Trojan-Horse'd his blood brain barrier and raised the LD-50. Yes, yes. And through flight-or-fight revelation shame, the Black Box Warrior- he skipped this town and headed straight down history.
- Elden Ring Introduction
Hoarah Loux, chieftan of the badlands. The ever-brilliant Goldmask. Fia, the Deathbed Companion. The loathsome Dung Eater. And Sir Gideon Ofnir, the All-knowing. And one other. Whom grace would again bless. A Tarnished of no renown.