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G.K. Chesterton
CAPPP

Stan Berkowitz and Darwyn Cooke
bro, PROOF READ

Unknown
LOL that funny

kjjjjjjj
Did you forget to edit out the last sentence lmao

Fuller
*possession* should be the word. a type error.

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Oliver Lugg [Excerpt from The Mass Extinction Debates: A Science Communication Odyssey] - List of Hypotheses For Why Dinosaurs went Extinct Before the Astroid Theory
The list of theories proposed at this time, in actual scientific papers, reads like a game of Cards Against Humanity. What killed the dinosaurs? Caterpillars, Egg-Stealing Mammals, Excessive Wetness, Excessive Dryness, Cataracts, Boredom, Suicidal Thoughts, The Inevitable Heat Death of the Universe, AIDS. AIDS? Oh wait, these last three were actually Cards Against Humanity Cards... And hypotheses for why dinosaurs went extinct...

JoCat (Joseph Catalanello) - The A-men - A Crap Guide to DnD - Cleric
Seriously with how versatile and independently strong you can build a cleric, you can make up a party full of purely priests, call it the "A-men," bust down Tiamat's door demanding her lunch money. And she would just build her own toilet to give herself swirlies so she wouldn't have to endure the kind of bullying you are about to give her.

JoCat (Joseph Catalanello) - Divine Intervention - A Crap Guide to DnD - Cleric
Divine Intervention, where if you are a good boy or girl, praying happy thoughts and burning that Dank Holy Kush. If you wish upon a star, the clouds in the heavens will part and the literal gods will stop playing their game of Jenga to fix whatever problems you and your party have gotten into. And then avoid you for seven days debating whether or not to write you a holy restraining order after seeing you pissed your pants over your religious senpai noticing you.

Makishima Shogo - The Murder of Yuki Funahara
I think there's value in people only when they act according to their will... The intelligence of science finally uncovered the secret of souls... But will of individuals are not taken into account that assessment... I wonder just what sort of criteria you use to divide people into good and evil. I want to see the splendor of people's souls... However, when people base their lives around Sibyl's Oracle, without ever consulting their own wills, do they really hold any value?

Emma Lazarus - Excerpt from "The New Colossus"
A mighty woman with a torch, whose flame Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name Mother of Exiles. From her beacon-hand glows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes command the air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame. "Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!" cries she with silent lips. "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore."

John Cleese - Monty Python's Flying Circus - Dead Parrot
It's not pining it's passed on. This parrot is no more! It has ceased to be! It's expired and gone to meet its Maker. This is a late parrot! It's a stiff. Bereft of life, it rests in peace. If you hadn't nailed it to the perch it would be pushing out the daisies. It's run down the curtains and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-parrot!

Winston Churchill
Statesmen are not called upon only to settle easy questions. It is where the balance quivers, and the proportions veiled in mist, that the opportunity for world-saving decisions presents itself.